Seriously...it's not that easy!!

After about 4 years of not having cable I move in with a roommate who had to have it so I am fully benefiting from it. I find myself watching a lot of cooking shows (MTV is not as good as I remembered lol), and these people make all the most amazing things. It is driving me nuts that these people keep saying this is quick, this is easy, anyone can do it lol. What?? None of this looks quick, easy or like something I can do haha. Also, I want to know since when did "just a drizzle", mean a huge dumping of olive oil.
I really want to learn to cook some of this stuff the food looks so great and fun. The only thing is cooking extreme things for one is NO FUN! Why cook something that takes an hour just for myself. The funny thing about this is half the stuff these people are using I have NO clue what it is. I need some Cooking 101 ASAP! I also need more cooking tools to make stuff.
I love some of these cooking competition shows its really cool to watch people have cook offs.
Another favorite show of mine is the Jaime Oliver Food Revolution, this guy is putting his heart and soul into changing the way people eat to help them be more healthy. It is very inspiring. Now if only I could learn how to cook so I could be healthy and make it easy :) Any tips?