Friday, October 22, 2010

Bullying in Todays Society

Bullying is a huge problem worldwide, and it seems to have reared an even meaner headed in todays society. With things like Facebook, Twitter, YouTube, and email bullying has climbed to an all new level. The effects of bullying can last forever, and with such easy access to social media the ability to bully is limitless. When I was in high school there were very few bullies, and by no means were they going online to do their dirty work. It was only 10 years ago and there was not even an option to bully online, it was old fashion teasing and kids being jerks. In todays society bullying consists of completely breaking someone down to the lowest form and spreading it all over online. In my opinion the biggest difference between bullying and how kids react today versus ten years ago is that when someone was bullied ten years ago only a handful of people would find out about it, today kids are spreading it all over the web. I cannot imagine how these poor kids feel when bullying goes online because other join in and it becomes a real life monster before anyone can stop it.

A friend of mine who is older has a teenage daughter who got heavily bullied online this past year. She was not a very popular girl and she put herself in all the wrong situations, but never deserved to be harassed. The bullies began to spread lies about her online and they would invite their friends from other schools to jump in and bully the girl. There were kids that knew nothing about her jumping in just to be mean. It got to the point, where a complete stranger was telling the poor girl he was going to come to her house and take care of her. At this point my friend, who was the mother of the bullied girl had to file a police report. The police actually went to the house of the girl who was recruiting people to harass my friends daughter. This was just this past year, and I know the girl still struggles with trusting people because she is afraid that it will happen again. Her mother pulled her out of the school and transfered her to a neighboring school in hopes of squashing the problem.

A second situation involved a parent and her daughter making online videos and posting them to Facebook to bully some of the girls classmates. When I saw the video I was beyond shocked and disgusted, because a parent who is at least 30+ is on a video posted to Facebook calling 3 teenage girls jealous bitches and all assortment of other names. This 30 year old woman had the balls to go on video to call teenagers names and threaten them, that is beyond unacceptable. She did not stop there, she went to all the upcoming basketball games with her daughter and stared down the girls she was bullying with her daughter each time. This situation made me really question what was wrong with people, especially parents who thought it was ok to go after children. I do not care if your kid is telling you these girls are mean, then you talk to those girls parents; what you do not do is take to Facebook video to call them bitches and threaten them. What happened to parents leading by example?

To know that being bullied is so hard to take for some kids that they are committing suicide is so sad. No kid should ever feel like they have to disappear just to finally be rid of their pain. I also think parents need to pay closer attention to what is going on with their kids. If your child is in pain you have to be there for them so they release the pain instead of hold it in and feel like they have no one. I have to admit that I often wonder why so many parents do not know that their kids are being bullied or are the bullies. Are parents taking a hands off role, or is it really happening that quietly? In the days where a majority of the bullying is online, I think there is no excuse for parents to not know what is going on. Parents should be aware of what is going on with their children at all times, they should have access to their Facebook. I know kids want their privacy, but give me a break there are things more important, like saving their life.

I was shocked when I logged onto Facebook today and the first status message I saw was a friend going on a rant how kids need to learn how to deal with bullies. Essentially calling them weak, I just think thats wrong. Yes, kids should learn how to cope and be strong but they are not the problem. Parents need to get control over their bullying kids, and maybe hug them once in awhile or send them to a psychiatrist. The child being bullied is not to blame. I really believe that all high schools and even grammar schools should have anti-bullying programs to teach kids the real results of bullying.

When I was in high school I was never bullied but I saw the effects of others being bullied and its unacceptable. When you look back on those years, I see that the biggest bullies are now the biggest losers. It is because they are deficient in areas that make them feel the need to over compensate and feel like the big winner by bringing others down. I wish kids could look into the future and see that things would get better, they just have to remove themselves from the here and now and make it through the tough times. I also really wish that people would take those being bullied under their wings and let them know they have support and they are not alone.

There is an excellent website with resources on bullying, to check it out visit: http://www.stopbullyingnow.hrsa.gov/kids/
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4 comments:

Sarah said...

I was never bullied either but I've actually been learning a lot about bullying in school and there was one statistic that shocked me, that over half of children are bullied at some time in school BUT have also played the bully role themselves. I thought that was really interesting, once they're not being picked on they turn around and victimize someone else. I'm not sure what kind of solutions there are to stopping such a prominent thing in school.
Wearing It On My Sleeves

Unknown said...

Sarah that really is an interesting statistic. I can't say I'm surprised though, it is just like actual physical abuse, alcoholism and even things like smoking. We might be a victim or it or see people do it and not agree and then turn around and do it. When I was little I use to always tell my mom not to smoke, and when I got older in college I did on occasion.
I wish schools would teach kids about bullying in grade school so that they would understand before it just started happening to them and they had no idea what to do.

Literate Barfly said...

I've always wondered why some people are so cavalier about bullying--"let boys be boys!" and all of that business. We don't tolerate bullying in the workplace. We don't tolerate bullying in our homes. We don't tolerate bullying in public venues. Why, then, is it okay to bully people in school?

Unknown said...

Dennis I don't know why some people think its just a kids being kids thing, I think its terrible. A lot of times I tend to think the parents who believe that are the same people who did the bullying back in their day and they don't understand the harm being done. I wish there was a way to teach kids just how bad it can be, and in the same effect teach kids being bullied that its ok that they are worth so much more than some horrible bully is making them think!!

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