The Savvy Brunette: May 2010

Sunday, May 9, 2010

We want what we can't have

It is totally true that we want what we cannot have. At least it is true in my case. I do not know if it is my competitive nature or what is it. Maybe a need to prove that I can do it. Either way...what the hell am I thinking. There is one guy, yeah just one that I have always wanted but he is at the tip of my fingers. Not completely gone, but never completely here. I often think, what would I do if I got what I thought I wanted. It would never work we are entirely different and have nothing in common. So even though I know this, I still cannot get over it. It is like I do not want to take the loss or something. I have that winning is everything attitude and it is rearing its evil head here too.

Monday, May 3, 2010

Learning how to date like a man

Apparently its time I "maned up" and started dating like a man. I know sounds crazy right? I have decided and my ex has told me that I date with too much emotion. I hate to admit it but I think he is right. I always wear my heart on my sleeve and am very honest about what I am thinking. I guess I am just saying too much too quick. I am not blurting out any I Love Yous or anything but I am still saying too much. I do not necessarily know how to learn how to be different but I have to do it.

I am stumped as to why men start out by saying they want a relationship and than they freak when dating starts to get a little too regular. I have to take the proverbial pants off in the relationship, while still keeping my real pants on which we all know is what the guys really want...boo! So by saying I am interested and having a good time spending time with them, they then see that as a weakness or some type of invitation for sex. Or so I am told lol.

I am not sure why I am so worried about dating anyhow I am in the middle of a really difficult class. It is only my second graduate school class and I am already overwhelmed. The teacher is way hard and is really a stickler for grammar which I have still yet to master and I am 27 years old. 27 and a grammar idiot lol! Anyhow, I digress...back to men. Yeah, I do not know what to do about them lol.

Maybe the whole playing hard to get really is not a big ole joke. I always preach honesty and saying what is on my mind, but apparently to a guy hearing that you had fun or are interested in him is scary? I mean I can see it being scary if I had fangs or a hairy upper lip. I can assure you that I have NEITHER. So now what? Time to take the ex's advice and play it cool. Time to focus on school and leave the dating thing alone or at least not put so much of my time and care into it. If I go out with someone then whatever...if it works then whatever. Right? I guess we shall see. 27 and single seems like I am pushing it. I do not want to be old and bitter searching for a man that is for damn sure.